Tuesday, February 16, 2016
HOME Presentation
Hello, I'm Karianne,
My passion for home decore developed from an early age.
When I was 2 months old my parents moved to the middle of nowhere at a church that couldnt pay them in a house that the last pastor, who has been supported as a missionary, wouldn't live in many years before. It had sat empty and falling apart. My dad patched it together after they moved in. Even their car was held together with duct tape. The community had one blinking red light and an Indian reservation. We were 40 minutes from a town. And the place we lived wasn't accustom to new people. Nor were they very welcoming. My mom struggled with baby blues after her 3rd child and loneliness.
A pastor's wife from the next town over came alongside and befriended my mom. She said, "Lets make your house beautiful!" and created a project for my mom. She was an interior designer and in the 80s the country style was full of layers of crafts and fabric and wood creations. My mom taught herself how to create the things from the magazines that her friend lent her. My dad built the wood shelves with the cut out heart and pegs. My mom wove baskets and painted and sewed and created a beautiful home. The neighboring pastors wife moved back to the city and left my mom a different woman. During the process of creating a home my mom grew. She could sell crafts at shows at the one local cafe. She started building relationships in town because having a pretty home made her feel more confident in her hospitality as well as giving her a tool to invest into others. She could offer help in teaching women to craft, or to arrange their shelf decorations, or to go to events with. It expanded her connections and her confidence.
She didn't have money to buy things. And yet she learned to use what was available and create beauty. And that translated into other areas of life too. She blossomed as someone who could give and live with open hands and embrace and trust God and have the most hospitable home I've ever seen. She's had 17 exchange students, and people over to her house at least twice a week. It might be a mess, but she knows her goals and what she wants her home to be, and it is. Mess or not, it's an open door and a place of heart.
Her journey inspired me to see and cultivate beauty in whatever is in front of me as well. And to be intentional about my home. Over the years I was drawn to another way of living - the simplicity of minimalism. My mom had layers of clutter and decoration and the pretty was often stacked high with papers and randomness and a basket of half folded laundry. I wanted a home was a beautiful place of peace and simple sweetness. It's been a hard lesson for me, and I still have to be proactive and intentional to fight against stuff creeping into my life. I prefer soothing freedom over a home full of things. Stuff = maintenance time. Simplicity = margin.
This nicely designed vignette is full. This country style is becoming a little dated as people are hungry for simplicity and embracing a less layered look.
The Scandinavian style below shows a more minimalist style.
(House on the way)
(trendenser.se)
You can see that this livingroom has some plants and books and the decore would be just useful everyday objects like the teapot and magazine and blanket or pillow. The functional things are pretty, but not items added that serve no purpose.
There is a balance between personality and simplicity.
I want both. I was to have a house that expresses our family and our goals and is lovely to be in. But I also want it to have the simple clean emptiness that gives such rest and calm (and not take too much time to maintain!)
GOAL #1 = balance
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We don't always know what to do - or how we will get from point b to point c to point d,
but we know what kind of a woman we want to BE
Pause here and write out some words of the woman you want to be - a few of your values
There isn't a list of duties a woman must check off to be living abundantly
you don't have to own a pinterest perfect home to achieve virtuous woman status
There is just a list of the fruits of the spirit that are to empower us along our own journey
What we want is for a home that is filled with the fruits of the spirit. So what kinds of things help us have love and joy and peace, patience, goodness, and self control in our home?
http://www.stonegableblog.com/the-fruit-of-the-spirit-printable-chalkboard-art/
Today I'm not here to tell you how to copy what someone else did into your home or what to buy to look like the other person's pretty.
I'm here to ask you about your home - about if it fits what you want your home to BE
If it is the tool that reflects what you want in the place that you and your family gather
This is what we will cover in this workshop:
1. define what direction you want to go
2. identify some of the obstetrical that you'll face
3. get inspired to find creative solutions for your own goals
Two things to keep in mind:
even if you rent, or are in a temporary home, that doesn't mean that this phase in life doesn't count. Your home is the space that you gather with those you love - and whether this is the longterm spot or not is irrelevant. creating a home is important even if it's at a campground! We want to live fully in today. I had a dear friend who announced they were moving and immediately I wanted to stop hanging out with her because I felt like it would hurt to pour more into someone who would be soon gone. God reminded me that this is a scarcity mentality and not an abundance mentality and I kept the friendship intentional, and she ended up not even moving. But being a part of her journey to stay in Peoria was worthwhile. So invest into home right where you are today, even if home is living in a temporary place. Plus, if you do plan on moving, the home created feeling will make it easier to sell and easier to move into the next place!
Second thing: i'm not going to encourage you to buy anything. you may need to make some purchases but probably that is way down the road. and often you can get creative with something that's already there. the effort it takes me to haul 4 boys with me to a store often makes me think harder about a solution that's on hand. It's been a blessing!
GOAL #2 = Live Abundantly
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List 3 things you want your home to BE
List 3 things you do NOT want your home to BE
Here is a sample of my words:
RESTFUL (peace) - how do I allow and plan for my home to be a place of rest PEACEFUL - candles? Music? lack of clutter? lack of noise?
INSPIRING (joy)- do I know what inspires me? and do know what inspires my children? Do I know the differences between holding on to tokens that I think should inspire me or used to?
CELEBRATE (love) - how do I make our home a place of everyday joys and victories? MEMORIES - do I have boxes of decore for christmas? it is more meaningful to have hand gathered outdoor items from a family walk? Is the simplicity of seasonal decore sweeter because it's not store bought and the process is the magic? Am I trying to buy a feeling that only comes with creating and embracing imperfection?
ENGAGING (kindness, patience, self control) - toy area, tv area, reading area, drawing area, playdough, recycling, clean up routine (The mess box - mom sorts it out later - but kid has put it all away) husband and wife place (coffee)
Avoid words:
BUSY: Life is busy enough. I don't want the house to be. I love dramatic wallpaper, but it doesn't belong in our family room.
CUTE: I have a lot of males in the house. A cutesy room doesn't fit our family.
FORMAL: I want to live life freely and make people feel comfortable
EXPENSIVE: This is a tricky thing because I really really want QUALITY but I really do not want something that I will hold too dearly
What does this look like in real life? Well, it means that if I pick up a darling little item at Target I can stare at it an say "this is small. it's going to need to be completed with multiple things. it's going to get busy. it's so super cute - but cute doesn't fit my goals."
GOAL #3: Evaluate what works and doesn't work
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So now we have an idea of the FEEL we want.
Lets talk about some of the roadblocks
http://noahsdad.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/living-room-full-of-toys-duplo-blocks-down-syndrome.jpg
OBSTICALS:
1. feeling like i don't have enough house or budget to work with
2. perfectionism (perfectionism comes from a need of acceptance where as excellence comes from a desire to benefit everyone)
3. time (plan a rhythm and know where this fits in)
4. clutter
5. children's stuff (baby gear, toys)
6. paper mess
7. This isn't my forever home
one of satan's best lies is "right now doesn't count - the future is important but not today. you're not to the good chapter yet"
I have a single friend who is waiting for her life to start. And I fall into that trap too. "Once the kids go to school..." or "When the baby is old enough to leave for a weekend..."
I have many days where I think "once I have 10 minutes to myself then I will..." and dream of the next chapter instead of embracing this one.
Your next home isn't the one to look forward to. Right where you live, right where you have dinner with your kids, THAT is what matters. This is the moment to which we are called to make a home.
FIND YOUR RHYTHM.
I have a secret.
You need a new rhythm. About every six months.
Find it and re-evaluate and find it again!
(https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/1c/49/82/1c4982293be2597a3dee5896e36b39b9.jpg)
WHAT WORKS FOR OUR FAMILY RIGHT NOW - and how does our home accommodate this? How does my home help me cultivate the things I'm trying to do?
The chalkboard was is a place for me to write out how we spend our evenings, and a time out chair for the kids to reflect on one of the fruits of the spirit.
My home tour shows what is working for me at this phase.
Here are some other of my current gems:
1. I have a calendar with pockets. Birthday invites go in there. I throw away the papers that I don't need.
2. I have a walmart/amazon list and a grocery list. I do some online shopping and grocery shopping.
3. I have a chalkboard wall with our weekly rhythm on it. So mom and dad and kids know what to expect. On game night mom and dad have to plug in for an hour and then we check out and everyone is happy.
4. I have a basket where christmas cards, birthday cards, valentines etc go. We pray for the person and throw away the card.
5. Coupons go in the van door.
6. I do not save receipts or or instructions or things that can be found online
7. I remember these mottos:
“Everyone gets to decide how happy they want to be, because everyone gets to decide how grateful they are willing to be. — ANN VOSKAMP”
“I always apologized for my home to protect myself so people wouldn't think I was a slob, or at least so they would know that I acknowledge I can be a slob and that I'm not okay with it and that really I have much higher standards. . . . When I apologize for my home, I'm declaring to all within earshot that I'm not content. That I'm silently keeping score.”
― Myquillyn Smith
“In her book The Reluctant Entertainer, Sandy Coughlin writes, “Excellence is working toward an attainable goal that benefits everyone, while perfection comes from a place of great need — usually the need to avoid criticism and gain praise and approval from others.”
Hello. Nice to meet you!
What do I do? Oh, I’m a Stuff Manager.
No, I don’t really like it but, isn’t that what everyone does?
My daily routine involves looking through my stuff, putting stuff away, organizing stuff, feeling guilty because I haven’t organized other stuff, fussing at my kids because their stuff isn’t put away, wading through misplaced stuff in our garage, piling up stuff I’m tired of so we can sell it, packing away stuff I’m really tired of to give it away, asking my husband where he put his stuff, sorting, washing, and drying our stuff —
And then dreaming about more stuff that I want and the bigger house I “need” because my precious stuff won’t fit in our current house–I guess it’s too small.
I never planned on being a stuff manager, it just kind of happened and now that’s my job.
Oh, no, I don’t get paid for it. I just do it because I think I have no other choice.
I have a whole other job that I get paid for and I use most of that money to buy more stuff. I’m training my kids to be stuff managers too.
What? Why are you looking at me like that?
My kids have their own space for saving things. When their space is full they have to sort it out. They don't want to ever throw things away so we watched a hoarders episode on youtube. Now they want to donate vbs crafts and special drawings to goodwill. Poor goodwill.
GOAL # 4: Find your rhythm
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If you remember anything today remember to consider the SCALE
that and get rid of stuff. Less stuff and proper scale = a pretty home.
Trends change.
http://www.potterybarn.com/products/antique-wood-media-console/
The gallery wall was a great trend. But because one wall was busy the other walls needed to be simple. And now the trend of simple oversize art has been born out of a need for that balance
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/fb/01/77/fb0177cc88cbd97245ebbddd3bb91052.jpg
Distressed furniture used to be in style
http://vintageheadboards.storenvy.com/products/750197-distressed-80-130-yr-old-door-headboards
Now a cleaner look is in fashion
http://www.hgtv.com/remodel/interior-remodel/welcoming-retreat-for-winter-guests-pictures?nl=HGI_110614_bottom4img_&c32=c19d1b171ef45e2af31eec1db63843080a9536b0
Beige walls are out,
Gray walls are in,
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/82/c4/67/82c4676bec165a7cb0e7fc8e7225c34b.jpg
but you'll see the new trends are for white walls or dark bold colors or wallpaper
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/3e/9d/59/3e9d59f7b4a1dac7660c7b542d82ffc6.jpg
http://moderncountrystyle.blogspot.co.uk/2015/01/kates-creative-space-full-home-tour.html
http://blog.styleestate.com/style-estate-blog/pinspiration-100-gorgeous-master-bedrooms.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed:+styleestate+(Style+Estate+RSS+Feed)#at_pco=tcb-1.0&at_tot=20&at_ab=per-1&at_pos=19
Color themes like yellow and gray used to be trendy.
http://den-designstudio.blogspot.com/2010/02/its-gray-area.html
Now bright and bold mixes are current.
http://eclecticallyvintage.com/2015/02/eclectic-home-tour-hi-sugarplum-blog/
Layered decorating used to be in style, Now minimal is the fresh feel
http://www.onsuttonplace.com/2015/05/the-beginners-guide-to-farmhouse-style-decor/
http://www.centsationalgirl.com/2010/09/the-paint-on-my-walls/
Don't get too wrapped up in trends - they keep moving - but find things that speak to you, and things that can adjust easily to embrace a fresh look.
Quality furniture doesn't go out of style - but you can change up the function!
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqulSbHaKOhXmYwQb5wrtFqg_H87aMJYI6DpMquXii0T-A7Fpn-KnxADnP9cwCKXXWOIeQSryna3kLvbhvKipkSFA_gxuk-h2ivNaxhclcwfGuCh4-T12iAzBBxky_L-zVNkVFHMFgAqA/s1600/armoire+bar.jpg
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/d9/6d/15/d96d15412e2433d7f31386cf1c0afce6.jpg
I love the drama of this hutch used as a library
Let's talk styles. There is Glamour
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/e8/a3/ca/e8a3ca1e99327a89895cb9f20a5798f6.jpg
http://www.brit.co/2015-interior-trends/
And Rustic
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/f7/d5/c7/f7d5c70393554c8920a57e3f30a0e871.jpg
And Rustic-Glam
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/16/7f/e3/167fe3a9ae59672f6224d15fa08f3813.jpg
There is industrial
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/a3/98/7a/a3987ab7bcf65239a9c3ff107c945163.jpg
scandinavian
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/10-ideas-to-steal-from-scandinavian-style-master-bedrooms-224831?crlt.pid=camp.4HOfbg4dbzl8
and bohemian
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/08/c8/d6/08c8d6be0e8420b5fbc2ad8e87e3a730.jpg
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/c1/9f/57/c19f57c1c50c47aab39874dc992b594e.jpg
There are so many more styles like vintage, eclectic, industrial, coastal, etc.
Let's talk about some tricks:
blend two of your favorite styles into one room
forget about style as you start with what you have to look for function and size
This bedroom below isn't so much about color or pattern as it is about scale and balance
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/e0/2a/4b/e02a4b8587ea4464b3829a2947749556.jpg
Kitchens are leaving the white painted cupboards with stainless steel and pendent lights
http://unskinnyboppy.com/2011/06/to-paint-or-not-to-paint-that-is/
And moving to be a totally unmatching personalized style
http://www.housebeautiful.com/design-inspiration/g3055/2016-interior-design-trends/?slide=10
Open shelves, gold hardward, and all shades of gray cupboards are also in
http://www.heidipiron.com/Kitchens/Traditional/34
Does it really matter?
I still have the yellow-beige dated wall paint in my house because I don't have a good enough reason to change it.
Trends can be fun and beautiful and inspiring, but in the end - it's all stuff. And we know that material things, stuff, doesn't matter.
SO - where is this balance between fashion and focus?
Let's run over a few things:
Remember what you want in your house. Do you want your bedroom to be a place to refresh and renew? What prevents that? Do you want it to feel more like a spa? Get the office feel and computer out, downsize the amount of clothing in the closets and keep it more empty? Beautiful bedding or soothing wall tones - if they're a tool to fulfill a purpose - are a great investment.
What do you want in your dining room? To have friends and family gather at a table for pie and games and homework and baby showers? Does the room feel too crowded? Too dull? Too dark? Too formal? If you change it up, will it help fulfill the purpose and inspire you to live your goals?
If your goal is to keep up with the Jones - you'll never have a home you love.
If your goal is to resell one day - make choices that makes your house live and be filled with love. That's the kind of house people want to buy.
If your goal is to have a house that helps your family dream and grow - find out ways to embrace sweet and fun changes.
HOW DO PEOPLE FEEL WHEN THEY CHANGE THEIR HOME FOR THE RIGHT GOALS?
- a healthy pride in their home
- more confident about opening their home
- more peaceful about being in their home
- more content in quality time together here instead of going out as a family or a couple
- ready to make more steps in life goals
- less fragmented and less frustrated
- renewed by the creative process
IF YOUR HUSBAND IS INVOLVED
Myquillyn Smith shares this wisdom. "Honey, I'd be really happy if you help me move the bed to the other wall."
and then, wait for it...... She then SHOWS happiness.
If you want your husband involved or to approve of the home changes, make sure it's a positive experience. This help your kids love the process too!
And, do stuff on your own ladies. Youtube it and get going.
WHAT IS REALLY OUT?
chevron. i wouldn't do anything major with that anymore.
all matching. a bed in a bag. matching bedroom furniture set. or matching livingroom set. don't spend a lot money on something that is all in one package.
big clocks as a statement piece. if you've got it - keep it. if you haven't, its not the latest or greatest anymore.
WHAT IS AND IS NOT WORTH THE MONEY?
Not worth it: trendy rugs. rugs change all the time. i wouldn't put a lot of money into a rug unless its safe or neutral.
Worth it: throw pillows - use them - they're not too expensive and totally add style
Worth it: lighting IS a great statement. if you find a good deal, use this to alter your room. Expensive but amazing.
Not worth it: bedding. it can be pricey and if it's the only thing you like in your room, chances are you'll want to change it up down the road. If you like your room in general a neutral bedding is fine. Use a throw or pillows to add bling.
Worth it: paint. clean and fresh and changes everything. when needed of course.
Not worth it: painting hardware or tile. chips off and never looks quality.
Not worth it: baskets and containers. Ways to hold stuff.
Worth it: Getting rid of stuff and having more space.
Not worth it: seasonal decorations that choke you and your storage
Worth it: a few large items and making/displaying current memories
Not worth it: stacks of books and magazines
Worth it: a bin or basket designated for the library
Worth it: nice livingroom or entryway wall art. This isn't the place for family photos but if you don't have a family room or staircase or hallway and you're going to do family pictures here, do an expensive artistic big print that you love (except it's outdated in a year) SO matching frames and big white mats and changing the individual photos is best. The white mats give it a much more professional and expensive feel in the repetition.
To sum it up:
I believe that everyone has a unique way of expressing themselves and a unique purpose as a family and has their own special callings.
Your clothing style, your communication style, your house style, and your ministry style - they're all reflections of your values and the person God made you. And they're all things that are worth an occasional evaluation. Have fun as you assess your home!
Goal #5 Scale
Goal #6 Style
Goal #7 Simplify
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